懂球帝首页 > 新闻正文

国外也有段子手:留给阿根廷的时间不多了...

西江月-song 2019-06-17 19:00:00

小伙伴们大家好,欢迎来到本期的“国外也有段子手”!上周的国际赛场精彩看点层出不穷,阿根廷在美洲杯首战负于哥伦比亚,巴西战胜玻利维亚,乌拉圭战胜厄瓜多尔。女足世界杯赛场,中国女足战胜南非,掌握出线主动权;而美国女足则以13-0的悬殊比分战胜泰国队。好了,话不多说,让我们快来看看歪果仁们的精彩吐槽吧!

开局不利,阿根廷0-2哥伦比亚

janembutt27(阿根廷球迷):起码我们还是能击败卡塔尔和巴拉圭的…对...对吧?(At least we can beat Qatar and Paraguay...right?)

bored-skull(未知主队球迷):与此同时,马特奥在家里说:“我是哥伦比亚球迷!”(Meanwhile Mateo Messi at home "I'm Colombia fan".)

Lorenzo_Insigne(未知主队球迷):比赛踢了25分钟,我才发现原来迪马利亚原来也在场上…(Took 25 minutes for me to realise Di Maria was playing.)

Marpe(巴西球迷):迪马利亚应该留一个阿圭罗或者奥塔门迪那种奇葩发型,这样我们就能记住他也在场上踢球了!(Di Maria should get a showy hairstyle like Aguero or Otamendi, so that way we can at least remember that he is playing.)

iciboy(布莱克本球迷):我曾经看过阿森纳和布莱克本的后防线,但要是论摆烂的程度,他们还是比不上阿根廷的后防线。(I've watched Arsenal defend, Blackburn rovers defend but none of them are as close to as shit as Argentina are at defending. Shocking…)

DIRTYDAN555(桑托斯球迷):如果你想看真正的足球的话,那我就友情提醒一下,加拿大和法属马提尼克岛马上就要在金杯赛里相遇了!(In other words, Canada is about to play Martinique in the gold cup if you want actual quality football.)

New_Diet(委内瑞拉球迷):我还是不理解,阿根廷有这么多大牌球员,为啥最后却踢成了一坨翔?(I still don't understand how Argentina manages to make great players play so shitty.)

deception42(美国球迷):阿根廷是可以派出11个大牌球员,但问题是他们全都是前锋…(Argentina can field 11 great players. The problem is that they're all attackers.)

Pringlydingly(未知主队球迷):阿根廷这比赛就像是一个巨大的面包圈一样,所有人都在边上跑,没有一个人在中间组织…(Argentina looking like a big donut any time theyre attacking. Not one player in the midfield. What is going on.)

Sal21G(阿根廷球迷):我想念以前还有小马哥为国拼到肛裂的日子…(I miss the days of holding mid mascherano splitting his anus for his country.)

Zakshowtime(切尔西球迷):过去3年里阿根廷就一直这么狗血,我就不明白为啥很多人还觉得他们输球很奇怪?(For the past three years Argentina have really been struggling and I don’t understand why people are surprised.)

Pistachio269(阿根廷球迷):其实…输球我一点都不惊讶…(I mean I can’t say I’m surprised.)

库鸟两球,巴西3-0玻利维亚

Tupiniquim(克鲁塞罗球迷):在巴西队踢球的库鸟才是最好的库鸟!(Brazil's Coutinho best Coutinho.)

Guyston(利物浦球迷):“利物浦”这几个字可不是那样写的啊!(That’s not how you spell Liverpool.)

williamm3(利物浦球迷):我是不是很坏,我现在还是喜欢库鸟…(Am I a bad person for liking Coutinho still?)

maroonmartian9(利物浦球迷):心里还是对他有着脆弱的一面...(still have a soft spot for him.)

thewhat23(洛杉矶银河球迷):看着这么多传中,还以为是曼联在比赛呢!(Looks like I'm watching Manchester United with all the crosses.)

diamondsam2(曼联球迷):这比赛简直比我在FM里玩圣马力诺还要一边倒!(This game was more one sided than my FM career with SAN Marino.)

ItsAWarZoneOutHere(墨西哥美洲球迷):这比赛看起来就像是几天前刚刚组织起来,并且是在谁家的后院里踢一样!(This looks like it was organized in the last few days and practiced in someones backyard.)

interfan1999(国米球迷):我请愿让美洲杯在玻利维亚举办,这样玻利维亚就有机会夺冠了!(Petition to host every Copa America in Bolivia so they have a chance to win it.)

(注:玻利维亚平均海拔超过3000米,是世界平均海拔最高的国家)

苏神卡瓦尼进球,乌拉圭4-0厄瓜多尔

Stupdizbu(乌拉圭球迷):我爱我狭小却又伟大的祖国!(Love my little big country!)

LordVelaryon(多特球迷):现在乌拉圭就差格列兹曼进个球了。(only Griezmann is left now.)

Gnorrn(未知主队球迷):厄瓜多尔的比赛战术就是肘击所有乌拉圭球员的脸…(Ecuador's strategy: elbow all of Uruguay's players in the face.)

nylujjjVA(未知主队球迷):如果巴萨聪明点的话,不如直接引进卡瓦尼对苏亚雷斯进行轮换,他们在国家队里简直是有化学感应!(Barcelona would be smart to at least consider bringing in Cavani as a sub or possibly start some games to rest Suarez. They have chemistry from NT play.)

掌握出线主动权,中国女足1-0南非女足

Dallas_FC(达拉斯球迷):哇哦,中国女足对阵南非女足一直保持不败,并且进球失球比是28-0!(Wow China is undefeated against South Africa 28 goals to 0.)

javk5pakfa(多特球迷):啊,如果我们还是本场的状态,下场面对西班牙将会很困难!还是得冷静下来,更多地掌握球权!(Ughhhhh if we continue to play like this we can't do anything to Spain! Gotta stay calm and keep possession more!!!)

Nycgarbage(纽约城球迷):南非女足踢得就像是少一人作战一样…(Looks like RSA is playing a man down they have absolutely no attack…)

Gaminium(法国球迷):实际上她们是少了11人作战…(actually it looks like they are 11 men down.)

(注:此处men双关)

不可思议!美国女足13-0泰国女足

VictorAkwaowo1(皇马球迷):希望本场比赛不要影响美国和泰国的国际关系…(Hopefully this game doesn’t affect USA’s relationship with Thailand lmao.)

Nikicaga(未知主队球迷):美国是在泰国发现了石油资源了吗?(Did they find oil in Thailand or what?)

Hunchovis(未知主队球迷):这绝对是对日内瓦公约的公然挑衅!(Absolute violation of the Geneva Convention.)

Santeyan(未知主队球迷):反正这也不是美国第一次对东南亚国家不遵守日内瓦公约了…(Not the first time the US breaks the Geneva Convention rules against south east Asians.)

MassiveOutlaw(美国球迷):从车里出来走到办公室的这段时间,我错过了3个进球。(I missed three goals in the time it took me to walk from my car and into work.)

Baraboosh(加拿大球迷):当时世界杯德国踢巴西的时候,如果勒夫没让球员半场时就收手,会不会也踢成这个比分了…(is this what Germany v Brazil would have looked like if Low didn't tell his team to settle down at halftime?)

Przemek_Juan(未知主队球迷):这就像是玩FIFA的初级模式一样!(This is like playing FIFA on beginner difficulty.)

JALbert(曼联球迷):不,FIFA的初级模式会在你5-0领先的时候就提醒你已经掌握了如何操作,然后就会让你提升难度之类的…(No, because FIFA on beginner difficulty tells you you've mastered it and asks if you want to turn the difficulty up at like 5-0.)

Jannukaz(热刺球迷):美国队的门将是不是已经无聊得快死了…(USA's goalie must have been bored to death.)

BVB-Oeli(德国球迷):比赛快结束的时候,德国直播解说员都在抱怨说要怎么把这场比赛做成5分钟的集锦…(towards the end of the game the german commentator was complaining about how he is supposed to fit all of this in the 5 min highlight video of the match...

罗伊斯进球,德国8-0爱沙尼亚

Herrmallo(未知主队球迷):这简直就像是在踢巴西队一样!(This is like playing against brazil.)

DrXyron(爱沙尼亚球迷):作为爱沙尼亚人,你这话这让我好受多了…(As an Estonian I feel flattered.)

Footysocc(德国球迷):可以确定了,巴西比爱沙尼亚强!(Brazil > Estonia confirmed.)

ScottTheUnit(未知主队球迷):和昨天的女足世界杯相比,德国算是比较谦虚的了…(lol so humble compared to the USA Women team yesterday.)

Kingarnaud(比利时球迷):我想看德国队大战美国女足!(We want Germany vs USA women.)

好了,亲爱的小伙伴们,本期的“国外也有段子手”就为大家播报到这了。让我们拭目以待,来看下期歪果仁们更加精彩的犀利吐槽吧!

分享到:

非常抱歉!